Certified Fart Master Tee

Name: Certified Fart Master Tee
Brand: FARTMART
SKU: 2107607_15114
Price: 29.95 USD
Availability: InStock

$29.95

Decades Of Training, One Very Specific Skill

A small, ancient, green-skinned master in brown robes stands with his hands at his sides, expression completely calm, while a glowing green cloud gathers beside him. CERTIFIED FART MASTER above, and below, the line that makes the whole thing: THE GAS IS STRONG WITH THIS ONE.

True mastery is not about force. It is about patience, breath control, and knowing precisely when to release. The apprentice announces it. The master simply allows it to happen, says nothing, and lets the room draw its own conclusions while maintaining an air of total spiritual calm.

Black, with the kind of design that gets pointed at across a room. Made for anyone who has been quietly perfecting this discipline for years and is ready to accept the title.

Specifications

Shirt color: Black
Front print: Small green-skinned master in robes with a glowing green cloud
Back print: FARTMART logo with green cloud
Material: 100% ring-spun cotton
Fabric weight: Heavyweight 6.1 oz/yd² (206.8 g/m²)
Finish: Garment-dyed for a soft, broken-in feel
Fit: Relaxed unisex
Collar: 7/8" double-needle topstitched
Construction: Twill-taped neck and shoulders, double-needle armhole, sleeve and bottom hems
Sizes: S to 4XL
Includes: 1 x T-Shirt

Size Guide

Size	Width (in)	Length (in)	Sleeve center back (in)
S	18 ¼	26 ⅝	16 ¼
M	20 ¼	28	17 ¾
L	22	29 ⅜	19
XL	24	30 ¾	20 ½
2XL	26	31 ⅝	21 ¾
3XL	27 ¾	32 ½	23 ¼
4XL	29 ¾	33 ½	24 ⅝

Shipping Information: FREE delivery on all orders over $99

All sales final. We have your money and that chapter is closed. You clicked buy on a store called FartMart, so there are no change of mind returns and no exchanges, on anything. If the box arrives empty, smashed or holding somebody else's joke, email Gasman@FartMart.com within 14 days of delivery with your order number and a photo and we will replace it, or refund it if we cannot. "It smells like shit" is not a defect. That is the product.